Seven Sentences for Sunday: The Oddly Thankful Edition

A few weeks ago when I was visiting my sister in L.A., I visited her MOPS group. Along with their monthly teaching, they also did a craft project where they decorated mugs with things that they were thankful for that you might not necessarily be thankful for in the moment. With that in mind, here is my list of my oddly thankful things.

  1. I am thankful for sassy mouths…because it means my children have the power to reason with their strong vocabularies.
  2. I am thankful for middle of the night nursings…because those moments are so fleeting, and I know that it’s the only time that my baby will rely on me alone for nourishment. (respectfully borrowed from my sister, Lacey.)
  3. I am thankful for early morning wakeup calls during the school week…because it means I can make a fried egg sandwich for Rhett and see him and Jolie off to school.
  4. I am thankful for past mistakes—the ginormous ones and the only mildly big ones…because they guide me through the stumbling blocks that are sure to continue to line my life path.
  5. I am thankful for heartbreak…because it makes me appreciate the swooning of a new relationship that much more.
  6. I am thankful for afternoon kindergarten…because it means I get special time with Paisley every morning, even if it means stretching the budget just a bit tighter so I can stay home with her until she enters school full time next year.
  7. I am thankful for apartment living…because maintenance issues are not my own and because the kids have fun, understanding neighbors who don’t mind our loudness on occasion. 

I love you all, some more than others.

Kicking Around The Cobblestones…

My cerebral radio DJ has been looping Simon and Garfunkel all day. I woke up with the relaxing melodies of “Feeling Groovy” flooding my mind with happy endorphins, and they have put me in a peaceful mood since 7 a.m. This was a nice change of pace since I had spent the previous 24 hours brooding. Continue reading

Seven Sentences for Sunday: The Simple Rules Edition

Seven Rules for Dating Destiny, now that I’m online dating (eek!).

1. Thou shalt not reveal anything sexually about yourself on (or before) the first date that you would not tell your mother…or at least your best friend from college. Seriously, keep that shit to yourself until, say, I know more about you than what your favorite band is.Image

2. Thou absolutely positively shall not ever, never, tell me that you love me on the first date. Creepy to the nth degree, I don’t care how much of a romantic you are…

3. Thou shalt not even think about making me feel guilty for not rounding the bases before I am ready. I am wearing my “chastity belt” (unshaven legs) for a reason…deal with it.

4. Thou shalt respect the fact that I have children, that they are of utmost importance in my life, and that perhaps you should ask about them on occasion instead of ignoring that they exist.

5. If thoust want a response to your profile after thoust has checked out mine, send me an email with more than “hey…” And while we’re at it…if I have put myself out there by adding a few profile pics, you can add a few of your own. Don’t be a chickenshit.

6. Thou must understand that I am terrible at small talk…I will have revealed this before our date. So if thou can’t take the lead, then let’s do something action oriented, like putt-putt or bowling, where we can smack talk and have fun instead of staring at each other awkwardly over the dinner table.

7. Finally, don’t yell at me or otherwise talk down to me at any point during our budding relationship, because that will be the end of it right then and there. I went to a women’s college, I can stand up for myself.

I love you all, potentially one more than others…

Seasons Change and So Do I

ImageSo Sam has a new girl. And while I am wildly happy for him, I am also selfishly a little sad. Sad because whenever someone new is introduced, it always means there is a shift in a relationship. While I had been one of Sam’s primary sources of entertainment (and he mine) pretty much since we broke up last summer, there is now someone else who has his attention. I’m not jealous by any means—seeing him happy makes me happy—but I do have to confront this shift in our relationship from hanging out every time neither of us had the kids to me deliberately having to ask for Sam-time when I need it. Continue reading

16 Reasons to Date a Single Mom Like Me

  1. We’ve got that nurturing thing down. Whether it be to dry a tear or just give a hug for no reason other than to say I love you, that quality is innate in us.
  2. You may not be as cool as Bon Jovi, but we’ll still be your biggest fan. (I take that back—your kids will probably take first prize for a little while, but then we’ll move into first place when puberty hits.)
  3. We don’t need grand romantic gestures. Snap a picture of a cool cloud or a pretty flower and text it to us just to let us know you think of us occasionally. Continue reading

Preschooler Diplomacy

In the War of Words, Jolie’s two year advantage and encyclopedic vocabulary always trump Rhett. Today, however, Rhett won a round in the Battle of Insults based on the best rule for arguments: He who laughs first, wins.
Jolie: Know what? I’m gonna call you a stinker.
Rhett: Well, I gonna call you a butt.
Jolie: Fine. I’m gonna call you a pooper scooper.
Rhett (starting to crack a smile): A pooper scooper???
Jolie (glaring and sounding out the syllables): Yes. A Poo-per. Scoo-per.
Rhett (trying to suppress his giggles): Pooper Scooper. Hahahaha. Fine. I call you a. a. a…. A HOUSE!
Jolie (mouth hung open in bewilderment): A house?
At this point Rhett dissolved into uncontrollable laughter leaving Jolie no choice but to join in.
Absurdity thy name is preschooler. Congressional diplomacy, meet absurdity. Perhaps you two should talk?